22 Comments
User's avatar
Anne McClard's avatar

As an anthropologist, I enjoy your expat stories. I visited The Hague many years ago. A lovely city. I rented a car because I needed to drive to Germany. One day I mistook a bike path for a road. Needless to say people were mad, but they helped me find my way off to a street. Embarrassing! As for the language, I tried to learn the pronunciation of a few words—very difficult compared to German! Plug away and be proud of your mistakes. You won’t be sorry. It is probably difficult to force yourself, given the widespread knowledge of English there.

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

I appreciate you reading them and saying so! I am trying to take an informed look so it’s great to hear it resonates with the scholar in you.

I am honestly all-in on public transport because I know that would happen to me! I’ve studied the language for a while but it is so very easy to fall into English especially when put on the spot! I’m trying to be braver than my fear of making mistakes 🤞🏻

Expand full comment
Sarah Bringhurst Familia's avatar

As someone who has lived in Amsterdam for ten years, this was really lovely to read. I was just reflecting the other day on how the way the Dutch do things just feels normal to me now. I don’t even remember how a lot of this stuff worked in the United States. The emphasis on quality of life makes such a difference here.

One thing the city of Amsterdam does that I love is that every few years they set aside money for the different neighbourhoods, and let people submit projects and then vote on which ones they want to realise. A couple of years ago, we voted to paint a huge mural of Girl with a Pearl Earring on the side of a building nearby. We also have multiple neighbourhood gardens that have benefitted. It’s such a nice way of giving people a say in their community, and tangibly improving their everyday lives.

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

This warms my heart, thank you for reading and sharing your experience. Being new, I’m still awe-struck but hope to live here long enough for it to stop seeming so novel.

I love the neighborhood beautification projects—I always wondered where the glorious murals come from! I love thinking that not only are they something everyone who passes through can enjoy but they’re also a reflection of the people who live there.

Expand full comment
Kaila Krayewski's avatar

So interesting that feeling you had about giving up your car, and how you feel about it now after having experienced the Dutch system. Heck, between the transportation system and the incredible investment into culture and infrastructure, sure do make the Hague sound inviting!

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

It’s been a mindset shift for sure! Driving is such a common right of passage for the American teenager, but the feeling of mobility is a horse of a different color.

Expand full comment
Kaila Krayewski's avatar

Still reading, I just wanted to jump in to acknowledge how loudly I laughed out loud at the "Greyhound if you nasty" comment 🤣

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

You GET me!

Expand full comment
Kaila Krayewski's avatar

I do 🤩

Expand full comment
Kermits Traveling Buddy's avatar

Embrace HAPPINESS is the way to live!! I truly love reading your stories. It’s not easy moving to a new home & country. The language will come it’ll just take time. All the best 😊

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

Thank you so much! I am so glad to be sharing them—I hear through the grapevine you have some adventures of your own ahead. Right about now is a great time to embrace joy!

Expand full comment
Allen Kwon's avatar

The way you contrast your U.S. experiences with Dutch systems feels like therapy for the civic soul.

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

Holy metaphor Batman! That is what it feels like to me too—I’m learning ways I didn’t realize life could be different!

Expand full comment
FranB's avatar

This is making me want to move to Holland!

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

Definitely worth considering a visit! You can get the transit card and a five-visitor museumkaart!

Expand full comment
FranB's avatar

👍

Expand full comment
Emily Fata's avatar

What a great essay. I've been to Amsterdam twice and I've always been in awe at how civilized it is. This is my favorite takeaway-- "Day-to-day living is something you should get to enjoy, rather than struggle to survive." I feel like once you are exposed to this sentiment, you can carry it with you wherever you live!

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

I felt that when we visited, too! Having felt that kind of lifestyle, I agree that it would be very hard to go back!!

Expand full comment
Emanuela B's avatar

I read this with a touch of nostalgia for my past life in The Hague. The library was my favorite spot to write. Good luck with the language — I had to learn German from scratch during my time there. I didn’t learn Dutch because I didn’t want to mess up my fragile German. But I think that if you want to stay longer, it’s important to learn the local language.

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

It’s a wonderful city and I love knowing we share the library!! I agree, and that’s part of why I feel the push to learn. I successfully Dutched my way through asking for “something to go under the houseplants as protection from water” today…small victories 😂

Expand full comment
Rebecca K's avatar

Thanks for this lovely and insightful essay! This makes me long to live in an older European city (Albanian cities are pretty young)--the comittment to creating a place that is genuinely liveable just oozes out of the woodwork, it just feels good to walk around places like that

Expand full comment
Gillian Fletcher's avatar

Thank you for reading! I feel very fortunate indeed—young or old, it’s about what the society values and as long as you can live better in Albania, get it!!

Expand full comment